I know whining via dA journal is hella lame, but gosh darn it's my account and I'm going to do it anyway...~
It's no secret that my activeness on dA has been appalling since...well...some time last year and I keep giving the same old tired excuses over and over again
While these excuses are by no means lies (such as issues with lighting and shoddy camera equipment) I haven't being completely
honest about some of the big reasons why I haven't been posting that much recently. Seeing as I love all my watchers dearly and I feel guilty about my constant late responses or forgetten promises, I'm gonna be straight with you
*Deep breath* Here goes...
I've gotten into this bad habit lately where most of my free time (when I'm not working) is spent sitting around eating food or going out to clubs/pubs/house parties/whatever and behaving in ways would make even my 14 year old mid scene-emo-goth
phase self cringe with shame...
Ngl, I feel like I've let myself go a bit. Maybe it's not as bad I think it is but whenever someone takes a picture of me, 99% of the time I struggle to even look
at it without feeling a little depressed. Even when the picture is carefully planned out and taken from a nice angle (i.e. when I've taken it myself), I rarely feel happy enough with the outcome to post it online...
It was a pretty big knock to my confidence when I went into comicon thinking I looked cute and then the pictures started popping up and I was like:
"Jesus, I've gotten fat..."
So yeah, I'm trying to get my shit together. I've been eating a bit better the last week or so and I've started looking after my appearance again. Also, I'm quitting smoking
which my family and fiance are pretty thrilled about
and now only smoke at social events~ I do still have plans for future pictures and cosplays, but they are likely to remain scarce until I feel more attractive
Sorry for the whining, but I wanted to get it out there before you all started thinking I'd stopped caring about you. I appreciate every favorite, follow and lovely comment I get and I can never thank you all enough for them
'Till later, stay awesome (like I know you all will)